Look, I know this probably isn't the best way to begin a story, considering how pretty much everyone hates a pop quiz, but before you go any further, I need you to answer a question.
If you feel very committed to your answer, you might want to circle it with a pen so everyone will know exactly where you stand.
If you can't find a pen, or if this book doesn't actually belong to you, then it's probably better to just circle the answer in your head.
Ready? Here goes:
Do you believe in ghosts?
YES - NOT SURE - NO
If you answered YES, you are correct. Feel free to turn the page.
If you answered NO, please keep in mind that just because you don't believe in something doesn't mean it doesn't exist. For further proof, definitely turn the page.
If you're NOT SURE if you believe in ghosts, you should absolutely turn the page so the next time someone asks you that question, you can answer correctly.
BOY MEETS BOGEY
So, you passed the test and made it to the first chapter—well done. Though I'm guessing the real reason you're here is because of the video.
You know, the one of me (allegedly) freaking out on the last day of school?
The one that circled the globe faster than the speed of light and went totally viral?
There's a good chance you may have even helped it go viral by sharing it with your friends so you could laugh even more when you watched it with them. It's not like I blame you. If I wasn't the subject, I would've done the same thing.
But what if I told you the video was a lie?
What if I said that's not at all how it happened? That there are things in this world—terrible, dreadful, invisible things—that were 100 percent responsible but couldn't be captured on film?
Would you believe me?
Or would you roll your eyes and shake your head along with the rest of the minimifidians?
If you haven't seen the video, don't bother looking for it now. You'd only be wasting your time.
If you don't know what a minimifidian is, not to worry: all will be explained.
The absolute true story of what really went down is in the pages that follow. And while there may be times when you'll find yourself questioning if something so outrageous could've actually happened, I'm here to tell you it did.
And I've got the blue streak to prove it.
But before we go any further, here's a few things you should probably know about me:
My name is Maxen (Woodbead) Smith
I'm twelve and a half years old and completely normal in every way.
Except for the fact that I can see ghosts.